New York Jew
There are kosher chickens in the
supermarket freezer section
so we plant trees in the Negev
There are weddings officiated
by a priest and a rabbi
so we send clothes for the poor Soviet refugees
Our taxes are low
so we import prayer books from Israel
Public schools are closed on Yom Kippur
so we are allowed to complain about the heat
on the tarmac at Ben Gurion
Country clubs’ swimming pools don’t
forbid us
so we import etrogim from Eretz Yisrael —
you can’t grow them here
Our temple pews are mostly empty
so we write checks to AIPAC
and pro-Israel politicians
We have a first-rate Holocaust museum in DC
so we buy Teva sandals and SodaStream seltzer
Whenever neo-Nazis knock over some gravestones
in New Jersey the news covers it
so we buy Dead Sea mud online